“My son is not a surprise to the system, yet there was no planning, no joined-up working with the professionals. I felt so alone.”
As we prepared for the parliamentary launch of What comes after education?, we reached out to Rebecca, whose autistic son Joshua was a student at our Inscape House School and graduated last year.
We were thrilled when Rebecca kindly accepted our invitation. She has been a passionate advocate for people with SEND for years.
At our report launch event at the House of Commons in January 2025, Rebecca shared her ongoing journey to secure the right education for Joshua, and the challenges of navigating the system to find the proper support and care.
Read their story below, in the words of Rebecca:
“I am very proud to say that I am Mum to my wonderful son Joshua, who is so very loving. The potential he holds needs to be opened, and with the correct support, this can and will happen!
In 2017, I started to look for an alternative educational setting that would fit my son’s diagnosis of autism and other complex needs, as his previous special school had failed him badly.
All the research was done by myself and it involved hours of trawling the internet with nobody to help me. It was very hard and demanding to find the answers I was looking for, as there was nothing suitable in the area.
The only way he could get the correct specialist support, was for us to move south. This was a massive upheaval for myself, my son, my family, as well as financially - but I was determined to find the best educational setting possible. That is what he’s legally entitled to, and we all want the best for our children, don’t we?
My son doesn’t have the vocabulary to accurately say what he needs and wants. He depends on me to advocate for him.
Despite my best efforts, no one listened to me. I kept going and, eventually, the authorities listened and understood.
So many people just don’t understand what it’s like to be the parent of a child with special educational needs, and until they have physically walked in my shoes for one day, they will never comprehend just how challenging it is. It is mentally and physically draining.
Constantly having to repeat yourself time and time again to get the message across and champion his best interests adds even more stress and strain.
I did a huge amount of research to find suitable settings and to get a transition in place, with help only from another parent who had been along a similar path.
My son has had an EHCP since the age of 5. He is not a surprise to the system, yet there was no planning, no joined-up working with the professionals. I felt so alone.
Eventually I found the Together Trust, which provided my son with seven happy years of specialist schooling because they listened and could support my son’s needs. They get him. Now, he has moved to an equally amazing specialist college.
But that transition has been incredibly difficult because, once again, the local authority did not listen to us and were not open to our wishes.
Even though my son has been awarded a 3-year college placement, the local authority has said it will only pay for the first year. After that, they will move him into a supported internship or into adult social care!
They have made that decision without considering what is in the best interest for my son, without talking to the college team who support him and without talking to me. They are not putting him at the heart of the decision making.
So now I must prepare for yet another fight. I can prove categorically how much he needs his education in order to support himself in the future.
I am terrified what will happen next for my son when he leaves education. What is out there today isn’t good and extremely hard to navigate.
Yet, with the right support, my son has such potential. Thanks to the specialist school and the college he attends, he now does two half-days of work experience each week at two different settings and is thriving. That has happened because the college listens and the college understands. We as parents do our homework to find these settings and we don’t take NO for an answer.
We continue to fight for our children to give them the best outcomes, because if we don’t speak up for them, nobody else will!"
A huge thank you to Rebecca and Joshua for sharing their important story and for shining a spotlight on the difficulties facing young people with SEND and their families.
Sadly, these experiences are not uncommon. In our newly released report, our findings show that young people and their families up and down the country face challenges when transitioning into adulthood.
Help us drive change
Please help us make a difference:
- Use our easy form to send a letter to your MP, urging them to read the report and support our recommendations
- Amplify the report: https://www.whatcomesaftereducation.com
- Sharing your own stories by emailing: styliana.pasiardi@togethertrust.org.uk